I should be sleeping now, supposedly earlier. But the turnaround of emotions came very very fast after I started to hit some keywords on Google using my PC. I was also surprised to stumble upon.. well… err… I don’t want to give any clues but, a page.. basically, you can read something.
At first, I got excited because I found something, it made me feel good. But later on, reading further, I just realized, how so stupid I am, how I missed those opportunities, how I was very coward back then. AND I REALLY HATE IT! I hate myself for letting those days pass by while I am still holding these feelings all along.
The irony of life. Now, I just wish that I could easily say things the way I want it to be. But I can’t. I need to work hard to win this back. I don’t know how. I don’t know why, why do have things to be so complicated when things can be supposedly as simple as just saying ‘Hi’.
Wah, I’m still at rage right now. I cannot contain it until a while ago. But now I know, my feelings are right. I will try my best to get to work. This is 2012 for me, bring it on!!!
“Happiness doesn’t find you. You have to create it.”
“Something had to change in my life. What I was looking for, whatever it might be, wasn’t going to come find me. I had to go get it myself.”




